Monday, March 7, 2011

Are you helping or enabling...

Helping is a wonderful thing, and something we should all do more of it. Some people have a "who needs help'' radar. Deciding where to offer your help, or give your energy can be confusing for some. They feel they were brought here to earth, to help others, feeling anothers pain when they are in need, therefore helping others to the point of giving too much of themselves.

There is some practical things to remembering how to effectively and responsibly help someone.
First and most importantly.....you cannot help someone who is not willing to help themselves. For when you do all the work for them, they are free to sit back and let someone else do the hard work. Really,how is this helping them. When we do this we are enabling them to be non self sufficient. We can learn when and where help will be beneficial. There is a balance when it come to giving your energy to someone else.

There is large number of people who will give to the point of exhaustion, and while this is done with good intentions, your health could suffer and you may eventually start to resent helping all the time and although we do not expect anything in return, you do not want to feel taken advantage of or resenting the fact you give so much of yourself and are left feeling drained.

Good news....you can find the balance, first speak your truth to people, and yourself. Ask yourself next time you are asked to do something, Is this person capable of doing this themselves ? Is your doing this really going to help them or are you enabling them to skip out on the hard work we are all here to do, in order to evolve. Sometimes people just need a little encouragement to get things done, and praise when they have succeeded.

We all have tough things to do on this earth, unfortunately yet fortunately there are people who get into the pattern of helplessness, always looking to another to get things done, and on the other end of the spectrum there are people here who were brought here to help humanity and do so, to the extreme of their health and energy being effected negatively.

We all need to help others, it is essential for humans to evolve, we all teach one another, but doing it all for other people hinders there evolution and your health. Do what you can verbally with encouragement and love and if they truly need more, offer but do not slow their progress by doing everything for them.

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